To my Father, I forgive you.

My definition of love has changed a lot through my 20s. At 26, this has honestly been the year with the most ups and downs. I want to preface that I regret nothing. All the heartbreaks balanced out all the beautiful moments. All the beautiful moments with the wrong men.

There is no guide for love. There is no guide on how to be a successful well functioning adult. We don’t come with manuals. We are our own universes with our own demons just trying to figure it all out. Trying to understand others while most are too afraid to understand themselves.  

I think I finally understand what God has been trying to teach me.

I must forgive my Father.

My Father is a great man who was dealt a hard deck as a boy. Trying to figure it out by himself as a young man with no support in his home country, then dropped in the middle of a new country with even less. He has also been hurt. He is also human. I carry a lot of pain and even some anger, but I’ve decided to have a conversation with him before the end of the year. It’s time.

The lesson is to forgive him so I can forgive myself. Only then, after I’ve mended that crucial relationship, will I finally be able to let go.

My Father is my first love, and it’s taken years and awareness to understand that he didn’t mean to hurt me. He and my Mother were both just doing the best they could to be great parents. I forgive them. I love them.

I’m currently hurting, but I’m proud and thankful for my family. While many have entered and left my life, they have always been by my side. My greatest support after God.

I’ve decided to allow you all even more of an intimate look at my life. Why? So that maybe it can help yours.

I’m always here to listen.

Happy Sunday!

Gabriela A Tejada

**Follow my Instagram @astronomicalpoet & Twitter @Astropoet22 **

All images were taken by me unless stated otherwise.

13 Comments Add yours

  1. ullehaddock says:

    Thank you for sharing. Forgiveness is the best ‘band aid’ for the soul.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed. Thank you for reading.🌙

      Like

  2. Someone from Poland once told me they have a saying in their country that when we forgive our parents, that’s when we become free of them (or words to that effect). Forgiving my Dad was a pivotal moment in my life too (as I wrote about in my book, Coming Home for Good). These are momentous steps. Every blessing to you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s exciting! I don’t think many realize just how much unattended childhood trauma dictates our life. I final decided, after a string of not so great guys, that I needed to work more within so I can finally attract a high value partner. I feel lighter. Thank you for reading. 🌙

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Mark Wade says:

    It may not fix or cure anything, but letting go of the weight is a gift for both of you.

    Like

  4. rothpoetry says:

    A beautiful post! I hope your reconciliation with your father goes well.
    dwight

    Liked by 1 person

      1. rothpoetry says:

        You are welcome!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. beautiful ❤️ …. I’m right there with you …. and there is a lot of healing .. even in my 30’s that I still need to do to be able to love and be loved

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Just that we are aware and actively working on ourselves- that alone is something to be proud of. Most go their whole life without looking within. Thank you 🌙

      Liked by 1 person

  6. csprasath says:

    Really Nice !! , When we really learn to forgive !, that’s the starting point of self growth !!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. Thank you 🌙

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Marcia says:

    Pain is gain, and forgiveness is simply a choice, not a feeling. The healing begins after the choice. <3. Great page. Looking forward to visits.

    Like

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