Up until this point, I’ve been excited. Each year has been a stepping stone to what’s to come, and this one is the first where I genuinely feel a difference. Maybe a bit intimidated, anxious about what’s to come.
From 18 to 21, I was a young woman excited about the thought of freedom and becoming an adult. Yet, still at 25, I have no idea what being an adult actually means.
21 to 25 was a rollercoaster ride filled with bumps and loops, with moments I closed my eyes to due to fears, and others I closed my eyes to while I felt and screamed in excitement. Different passengers with me along the way, and at each stop, I would let people go so others could join me. So they could live this adventure with me, even if just for a moment. The years in which I finished school and made myself proud. The years where I took the leap and learned to swim for myself and my dreams. It was finding my ground as I started to run and pick up the pace. It was learning about what it meant to enjoy actual moments and trying to live in and for the now, and not the forever. Trying to find out what brings me fulfillment, creating boundaries and moments that I can look back and reminisce fondly on.
My early 20s were formative and exciting. I guess I’m mourning those years, grieving the young woman that lived throughout so much but really only just entered the actual world. Slowly throughout the years taking steps towards creating her own universe.
The older we get, the faster time flies and the faster memories get collected and stored.
To young Gabriela, I want to say Thank you. Thank you for getting on that ride and not jumping off regardless of the number of times you thought you couldn’t do it anymore, you kept going, and I’m proud of you.
26, I don’t know what you will bring me, I don’t know what the next four years of my 20s will bring this woman, but I promise to continue to run as I make myself proud.
Rejoicing and exploring,
feeling and breathing,
being and conquering.
Continuing to live my life for myself.
I Love you, Gabriela.
As they say, the best is yet to come!
Cheers to turning 26!
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